Although we experience many challenges in life, one of the most challenging experiences you can ever go through is a marriage at the brink of collapse. Chances are that you will be thinking of ways to save your marriage from breaking down. Your family is something that is worth fighting for, otherwise all you have invested in it - time-wise and emotionally among others - will have been wasted. Unfortunately, you may be at a loss as to what you should do.
There are four important measures that suffice to change the tide so that your marriage can get back to shape once more. Here are the things you should not take for granted.
Fighting fairly is something that many people in marriage relationships do not give much weight. You may have been talking about one simple matter, only for the discussion to turn to heated argument about many other things that you were not dealing with at that moment. This just results in lots of confusion and resentment. You should stick to the issue at hand and avoid personal attacks.
Every day brings a new start
You should learn not to bring yesterday's baggage into today's journey. Start afresh every day by ensuring that you forgive mistakes of the previous day sincerely and forget them before that day ends.
Understand that affection is not a weapon
Many married people tend to turn affection into a weapon for 'punishing' their partners when things go sour. When there is a problem, they withdraw their affection. If you really want to heal your relationship, you should do the opposite. This is when you should be even more affectionate.
You should understand that men and women view affection differently.
Men seek for affection more through physical gestures while women tend to focus more on verbal affirmations. When a husband avoids talking with his wife, he is turning affection into a weapon. On the other hand, a wife will do the same by avoiding physical contact - even sleeping separately, or at least changing positions!
Unfortunately, couples do not realize that when affection turns to a weapon, it comes with double edges, and they end up cutting themselves too.
Avoid the blame game
You should understand that each of you has personal weaknesses. You should not start pointing fingers whenever your spouse commits a mistake. Even worse, you may blame your partner for something that you are actually responsible for. When you spend time blaming each other, you will have no time to correct the mistakes or save your marriage, and you will just create more tension.
You should instead learn to own up to your mistakes and accept full responsibility. Then you should seek for the best solution. These measures will help you to save your marriage before it falls apart.